SUNDAY – NOVEMBER 30, 2014

 

NORA KRANK’S CHRISTMAS RECIPES

Christmas with the Kranks is a 2004 American comedy starring Tim Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis. The screenplay is based on the 2001 novel Skipping Christmas by John Grisham.   It is one of my very favorite Christmas films of all time.  So funny that I’m screaming each time I watch it, just as if it’s my first time.

After Luther Krank (Tim Allen) and his wife Nora (Jamie Lee Curtis) see their daughter, Blair (Julie Gonzalo) depart for a Peace Corps assignment in Peru on the Sunday following Thanksgiving, empty nest syndrome sets in. Luther calculates the couple spent $6,132 during the previous year's holiday season and, not looking forward to celebrating Christmas without their daughter, he suggests they invest the money usually spent on decorations, gifts and entertainment and treat themselves to a ten-day Caribbean cruise instead. Skeptical at first, Nora finally agrees.

 

The Kranks are amazed to discover how their neighbors view them as a result of their decision. Luther's co-workers think he has become Ebenezer Scrooge when he gives all his employees letters that state about his Christmas boycott, local stationer Aubie is distressed to lose the couple's order for their engraved greeting cards and Christmas Eve party invitations.  The Boy Scout troop is upset and angered when the Kranks refuse to purchase one of their Christmas trees to help the scouts make enough money for a camporee, and the police are stunned to discover they won't be buying this year's calendar from them.

Most vocal in their objections are neighbors Vic Frohmeyer (Dan Aykroyd) and Walt Scheel (M. Emmet Walsh). Vic, who's the unelected leader of the street, organizes a campaign to force the Kranks to decorate their home so Hemlock Street won't lose the coveted award for best decorations. The Kranks are skipping Christmas? Unimaginable. Unthinkable. Unbearable. 

Vic Frohmeyer

Spike Frohmeyer

 

To make matters worse, Luther refuses to put his illuminated Frosty the Snowman on his rooftop. Every house has a Frosty on its rooftop at Christmas. Hemlock Street is famous for it. Walt doesn't seem to like Luther, so his efforts are primarily personal. However, it is revealed that Walt's wife Bev is suffering from cancer, perhaps dampening his holiday spirits. Children picket, led by Vic's son Spike (Erik Per Sullivan) to have the Kranks' rooftop Frosty put on display, neighbors constantly call, and Christmas carolers try to revive the Kranks' holiday spirit by singing on their lawn which Luther stops them by freezing his front lawn. Even the newspaper gets into the act by publishing a front page story complete with a photograph of the unlit Krank house and states that the Kranks' street has lost the prize and won sixth place because of how Luther and Nora refused to decorate their house. Still, Luther and Nora continue to stand their ground.

The two are in the process of packing on Christmas Eve morning when they receive a call from Blair, who announces she's at Miami International Airport, en route home with her Peruvian husband-to-be as a surprise for her parents. She's anxious to introduce Enrique to her family's holiday traditions, and when she asks if they're having their usual party that night, a panicked Nora says yes, much to Luther's dismay. Comic chaos ensues as the couple finds themselves trying to decorate the house and coordinate a party with only twelve hours to spare before their daughter and future son-in-law arrive.

While Nora scrambles to find food, especially Blair's favorite honey baked ham, Luther goes to buy a tree from the Boy Scouts but they only have one worthless non-green tree left. Luther arranges to borrow the tree of neighbor who is going away for a week with his kids and wife, being given the warning that he is not to break one ornament or damage it. Luther and Spike try to transport it across the street on Spike's Radio Flyer wagon, only for the neighbors to confuse this to be Luther stealing the family's Christmas tree and end up being called for the police to arrest him for theft. Spike comes to Luther's rescue by showing the neighbors and officers that Luther has Trogdon's keys and thus was given permission to borrow the tree.  Nora comes home enraged at Luther for making the borrowed Christmas tree a "Disaster" and how she had to buy "Smoked Trout" to replace the honey ham (because the ham rolled into the street and got smashed by a truck). Once it is established why Luther is trying frantically to decorate his home, the neighbors, led by Vic, come out full force to help him and Nora ready it for Blair.

Blair calls to say she landed in Chicago and the local police are sent to transport her and Enrique home.  After subtly giving everybody including Blair and Enrique, an unthankful and non-friendly toast, Luther tries to convince Nora to accept the cruise when she confronts him for the toast, but she refuses, disgusted that he isn't happy that Blair's home. 

 Luther, having a change of heart, sadly slips out of the house and goes across the street to the Scheel home. Bev's cancer, once in remission, has returned and, knowing this may be their last holiday together, Luther insists they take the cruise in place of him and Nora, going so far as to offer to take care of their hated cat, Muffles, who's always under Luther's feet. At first they decline, but ultimately they accept his generosity. And Luther, whose holiday spirit has been renewed, realizes that skipping Christmas wasn't as good an idea as he had originally thought.

This hilarious adaptation of John Grisham's best-selling novel, "Skipping Christmas" will become an instant family classic!

And now, here are some recipes for foods mentioned in the film.

NORA CRANK’S PISTACHIO BARK

12 (1 oz) squares white chocolate
1 c. pistachio nuts, shelled and toasted

Microwave the chocolate in a microwavable bowl on high for 2 minutes, stirring after 1 minute. Stir until completely melted. Stir the nuts into the chocolate. Spoon the chocolate and nut mixture onto a waxed paper-lined baking sheet. Refrigerate for 1 hour until firm. Break into bite-size pieces about an inch in size. 

BLAIR’S FAVORITE HONEY HAM

2 cups sugar

1 teaspoon onion powder

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 teaspoon ground nutmeg (freshly ground, if possible)

1/2 teaspoon ground ginger

1/2 teaspoon ground cloves

1/2 teaspoon paprika

1 bone-in spiral-sliced precooked ham

 

In a small mixing bowl combine sugar, ginger, clove, paprika, onion powder, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Mix well.  Cover a baking sheet with aluminum foil; if you fail to do this, you may have burnt sugar on your pan, and it will take a while to clean off. Place the ham open meat side down onto the pan. Sprinkle with the seasoned sugar mixture. Press the sugar onto the outside of the ham. You may not use all of the seasoned sugar mixture.

With a blowtorch, gently heat the seasoned sugar mixture on the ham. Wave the flame quickly over the sugar—you want the sugar to brown, not burn. Staying in one area, and moving out from there slowly will make this easier, as you will be heating the sugar in a continual direction. This whole process will take about 15 minutes, so be patient. You can sprinkle more sugar on top of the already browned parts of the ham and make the crust thicker.  Leftovers are great  reheated or cold.

NORA’S CARAMEL CREAM PIE

1 (9-inch) graham cracker crust
2 (14 oz) cans sweetened condensed milk
1 (7 oz) jar marshmallow cream
1 (8 oz) container whipped topping 

Place the cans of sweetened condensed milk (labels off, unopened) in a large pot; bring to a boil, then lower the heat and simmer for 3 hours, making sure the water stays above the cans. Let cool 1 hour. 

CAREFULLY open the cans and scoop contents into large bowl. Fold in the marshmallow cream. Pour into pie shell. Chill in refrigerator for several hours or overnight.
Serve topped with whipped topping. When cooked that long, the sweetened condensed milk turns into caramel. Very yummy and so easy! 

 

ANOTHER GREAT COUNTRY COOK

Born Diana Ellen Judd in Ashland, Kentucky, Naomi Judd is one of Country Music’s all-time greats.   A singer, song writer, author and actress, she is also a great mother (daughters Wynonna and Ashley) and a fabulous cook.  In fact, she wrote one of my best and most-used cookbooks (Naomi's Home Companion: A Treasury of Favorite Recipes, Food for Thought and Country Wit and Wisdom) .  I’d give anything if she’d write another cookbook!

 

 

Here is a recipe Naomi for a beautiful Thanksgiving casserole that you’re sure to enjoy.

NAOMI JUDD’S SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE

"My mama was a cook on a riverboat in Mississippi. My mom knows her way around the kitchen. First of all, her grandmother, my great-grandmother, owned a little restaurant in our town. We lived in a one Dairy Queen kinda town, Ashland, Kentucky. The Judd family traditional holiday dinner is all made from scratch, and I think if I didn't make my Sweet Potato Casserole, Wynonna and Ashley would think they were orphans. They’d walk into the woods and never be heard from again… This is our traditional recipe" – Naomi

3 cups mashed sweet potatoes (about 2 pounds of sweet potatoes)
1/2  cup granulated sugar
2 large eggs, lightly beaten
1/2  cup milk
1/2  stick or ¼ cup butter, melted
1/2  teaspoon salt
1/2  teaspoon vanilla extract

Topping:

1/2  cup packed light brown sugar
1/2  cup chopped walnuts, pecans, or other nuts
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/3 cup butter

Preheat the oven to 350°. Grease a shallow 2-quart casserole.

In a medium bowl, stir together the potatoes, granulated sugar, eggs, milk, butter, salt, and vanilla and scrape the mixture into the prepared casserole.

Making the topping: In a small bowl, stir together the brown sugar, nuts, and flour. Sprinkle over the top of the casserole. Dot with the butter. Place the casserole on a baking sheet.

Bake, uncovered, in the 350 degree oven until heated through and lightly browned, 30 to 35 minutes. Let stand 10 minutes before serving.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING FROM OUR FAMILY, TOO!

To Grandmother's House We Go -- Thanksgiving in Florida, 1962

Daddy carving the Turkey -- 1964 and 1965

Me and my sister Linda

Steve takes on the Thanksgiving Turkey

WHAT WOULD MARILYN MAKE FOR THANKSGIVING?

Over fifty years have passed since she died, but there is still a shroud of mystery surrounding the legendary Marilyn Monroe.  While she might still be one of Hollywood's most recognizable icons, Monroe remains an elusive figure, having been found dead in her Los Angeles home in 1962 at the young age of 36.

Those who knew her said she was often misunderstood. She was not the dumb blonde she might have portrayed in her films. She was smart and driven.   Monroe was known as a bodacious bombshell who oozed confidence and charisma. Off-camera, however, her psychological state was frail. Her love life was a continuous roller coaster and she dealt with bouts of depression.

Her death had been ruled a probable suicide, but those who knew her found it hard to believe she would kill herself. Forensic pathologist Cyril Wecht told People magazine he has a strong suspicion she might have been injected.

A few weeks before her death, Marilyn's career and personal life, in a sense, were on the rise. She was invited to a number of new film projects and spent a weekend with Joe DiMaggio at Lake Tahoe.    They planned to re-marry.

According to eyewitnesses, August 4, 1962 was a pretty typical day in Marilyn's life.  She apparently, did not sleep well and was a bit annoyed. Monroe spent most of her day with her psychiatrist, Dr. Ralph Greenson, who noted a distinct change in the state of the actress, and explained it with Nembutal (a barbiturate). In the evening Joe DiMaggio visited her to discuss their reunion. 

 

 

Sometime after 10 p.m. on August 4, 1962, Marilyn Monroe slipped into a coma caused by an overdose of sleeping pills. She would never regain consciousness.

 

Following the autopsy, Marilyn's body was released to her family. Marilyn's mother, who was institutionalized, did not take custody of the body. Instead, Former husband Joe DiMaggio claimed her remains and arranged a small and quiet funeral for the woman he would continued to love until his own death. Finally on August 8, 1962, she was laid to rest in Los Angeles' Westwood Memorial Park in the Corridor of Memories, in a pink marble crypt at Corridor of Memories, #24..

Marilyn Monroe was buried in what was known at that time as the Cadillac of caskets -- a hermetically sealing antique-silver-finished 48-ounce (heavy gauge) solid bronze masterpiece casket lined with champagne-colored satin-silk. Before the service, the outer lid and the upper half of the divided inner lid of her casket were opened so that the mourners could get a last glimpse of Monroe. Hollywood makeup artist Whitey Snyder had prepared her face, a promise he had made her if she were to die before him.

The service was the second one held at the newly built chapel at Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery in West Los Angeles, and only 25 people were given permission to attend. Monroe's acting coach, Lee Strasberg, delivered her eulogy. An organist played Over the Rainbow at the end of the service. 

DiMaggio had a half-dozen red roses delivered to her crypt three times a week for the rest of his life. He never spoke publicly about his relationship with Monroe. He never recovered from her death and he never remarried.

 

The image of a bombshell cooking her way to nirvana may seem unlikely.  But back in the 1950s, a Hollywood starlet was not expected to squander her talents chopping onions.

Marilyn Monroe's stuffing recipe recently surfaced in "Fragments", a collection of her writing snippets from 1943 to her death in 1962. Marilyn's stuffing recipe showcases not only a knowledge of cooking, but also a surprising use of European methods for making a poultry dressing. 

MARILYN MONROE’S THANKSGIVING STUFFING

6 ounces pain au levian (sourdough)

1/4 pound chicken livers

1/4 pound ground sirloin

1 cup mirepoix  (a mixture of chopped celery, onions & carrots.)

2 bay leaves

1 cup chopped, fresh parsley

1 hard-boiled egg, chopped

1/2 cup raisins (substitute any dried fruits)

1/2 cup grated Parmesan

2/3 cup cooked chestnuts, chopped

1-1/2 teaspoons salt

1 teaspoon ground black pepper

1 teaspoon dried rosemary

1 teaspoon dried sage

1 teaspoon dried thyme

1/4 teaspoon marjoram

1/8 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg

Soak the pain au levian in water for 15 minutes. Drain the bread in a colander for 5 minutes and squeeze it dry. Pull it apart into small pieces.

While the bread is soaking and draining, prepare the livers and ground beef. Boil the livers for 8 to 10 minutes, until they are done. Finely chop the cooked livers. Brown the ground beef in a large skillet, and transfer the meat to a bowl.

Sauté the mirepoix and bay leaves in the remaining beef fat for 5 minutes. Discard the bay leaves and stir together the shredded bread, cooked livers, browned beef, sautéed mirepoix, parsley, eggs, raisins, cheese, chestnuts, salt, pepper, and dried herbs.  Marilyn's stuffing recipe makes approximately 10 cups 

Marilyn Monroe's Kitchen in her Brentwood Home

ONE OF THE FUNNIEST JOKES EVER:

A man walks into a bar with a small dog under his arm and sits down at the counter, placing the dog on the stool next to him.

The bartender says, "Sorry, pal. No dogs allowed."

The man says, "But this is a special dog -- he talks!"

"Yeah, right," says the bartender. "Now get out of here before I throw you out."

"No, wait," says the man. "I'll prove it." He turns to the dog and asks, "What do you normally find on top of a house?"

"Roof!" says the dog, wagging his tail.

"Listen, pal..." says the bartender.

"Wait," says the man, "I'll ask another question." He turns to the dog again and asks, "What's the opposite of soft?"

"Ruff!" exclaims the dog.

"Quit wasting my time and get out of here," says the bartender.

"One more chance," pleads the man. Turning to the dog again, he asks, "Who was the greatest baseball player that ever lived?"

"Ruth!" barked the dog.

"Okay, that's it!" says the bartender, and physically throws both man and dog out the door and onto the street.

Turning to the man, the dogs shrugs and says, "Should I have said Dimaggio?"